Witch Doctor Ritual Being Performed On GSP

Courtesy of Smoogy on the UG

I knew there would be a perfectly reasonable explanation for the GSP greasing accusations.

All the rubbing you saw GSP’s cornerman doing? Yeah, that was a ritual. And where did this ritual come from? A witch doctor. Yep, a witch doctor named Steven Friend. Don’t believe me, here’s highly respected trainer Greg Jackson in his own words.

Jackson spoke to MMAWeekly.com on Sunday afternoon and said the misunderstanding arose after Phil Nurse, one of St. Pierre’s cornermen, executed a ritual taught by a member of St. Pierre’s team, a “witch doctor” named Steven Friend.

“So in between rounds, (Friend) had this little drill that you do – and Phil Nurse is the one who knows how to do it – he showed Phil, and this is what Georges wanted, so we did that,” Jackson said. “But this is why we were doing it. He rubbed your back and tapped your chest; I don’t know exactly how it works. But anyways, what that’s supposed to do is get your energy in line, or motivated or whatever. So in between rounds, we had Phil Nurse do that.”

“The controversy came because Phil Nurse also was putting Vasoline on Georges’ eyebrows,” Jackson elaborated. “In between rounds, you always want to put on Vasoline on (a fighter’s face). So Phil Nurse put all the Vasoline on his face, so his hands might have had a miniscule amount left over from that, when he went around the side and rubbed a little point on his back, and tapped on his chest.

“At that point, somebody in the audience thought we were greasing George down, and ran over and told the commission that we were greasing his body down. The commission came in and said ‘you can’t grease him down,’ which didn’t work. They said ‘you’re putting Vasoline on his back,’ and Phil’s like, ‘oh, there might be a little on my fingers, but it wasn’t intentional at all, and of course they wiped it right off and it was gone, so it wasn’t a factor in the fight at all.”

You know what? Why the hell not? You can’t make shit like that up.

Nipple tweaking. Rituals. Witch doctors. That’s what comes out of the Jackson camp these days. I suppose you could call them crazy, but hell, two of their fighters hold two of the UFC’s five belts. So call them whatever you want, but they’re still producing champions.

Now, maybe if Thiago Alves gets him a little GSP voodoo doll and starts poking it before the fight he might actually have a chance. Hey, it’s worth a shot.